Fortune on the rocks (SPOILERS)

[Harry Fluks]

SPOILER WARNING: THE FOLLOWING TEXT CONTAINS SEVERAL TEXTUAL JOKES FROM
"FORTUNE ON THE ROCKS" BY DON ROSA (FROM U$ ADVENTURES 9)

I bought the Dutch version of this story yesterday (in DD Extra 6-1993).
I will give a simultaneous translation of some of the textual jokes in the
story. This can serve two purposes: Don Rosa himself can see how his
stories are treated, and Dutch members that don't have the English version
can see some of the original text...

English original                             Retranslated from the Dutch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~                             ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(page 1, bottom row)
Nephew: That's a mighty bleak peak,          Maybe a silly question, uncle
        uncle Scrooge! Don't you own any     Scrooge, but what do you want to
        OTHER desert land?                   do with that rock?
Scrooge: Just a single hundred-acre tract!   I wish I knew!
..: That's not a lot of land for Scrooge     That's why I got you here! You
    McDuck! Where's it located?              have to help me!
..: Downtown Phoenix!                        Of course!
(note that the gag is gone, and that the speakers are reversed in the last
 panel)

(page 2)
Don: that's nothing! I was quite the rock     There's more to that, Uncle
     expert in my day! The little Booneheads  Scrooge! Not the names of the
     named me Champion Rockhound and Adept    stones are important, but their
     Collector of Keen Pebbles and Other      finding place... and that's MY
     Treasures!                               speciality!
Scrooge: Your were a C.R.A.C.K.P.O.T.?        Are you such a tracker?
Don: I don't like to BRAG, but *ahem*...      Yep! I spot everything!

(page 3)
Don: So where do I hammer this spike?         How do we start?
Nephew: Right there, unca Donald! That's      We tie ourselves together!
        YOUR fault!
Don: Oh, SURE! Blame everything on ME!        Is there anything you guys
                                              DON'T know?

(page 5)
Scrooge: Bah! These are just worthless rocks! These are tracks of...
Don: Can I have a sample of whatever you've   I know it, uncle Scrooge!
     found?                                   Sapphire!
Nephew: I'm sure unca Scrooge would give you  Sorry, uncle Donald! The tracks
        the CHERT off his PACK!               are of worthless graphite!
Don: Ha! Not the uncle Scrooge *I* know!      But admit it, I WAS close!
Nephew: No, I mean...                         Well...

(page 8: in the Dutch version, the first panel is missing. This is because
it is a copy of the German version, and they published the story in 2
parts in Germany, replacing this panel by an introduction of part 2.
In Holland, however, they didn't publish it in 2 parts, so they filled
the panel space with the following text:)
                                              Uncle Scrooge's swing
                                              is that breathtaking, that
                                              readers with acrophobia
                                              will have guaranteed nightmares.
                                              Therefore we decided, after
                                              consulting the Duckburgian
                                              medical union "Quack",
                                              not to publish this scene.

(page 9, panel 3)
Nephew: Are you okay, unca Scrooge?           Something happened?
Scrooge: Well, perhaps if you LOOSENED this   Nothing worth mentioning. Can
         rope just a trifle...                someone loosen the rope?
(a rare example of a quite funny translation)

(page 10)
Don: What's THIS colorful rock?               What's this funny rock?
Nephew: That's GNEISS!                        Flint ("Fire rock")!
Don: I think it's nice, too, but what IS it?  But it feels cold!
Nephew: No, I mean that's a GNEISS rock! The  No, they used to break parts off
        rock is GNEISS! It's just plain       it to make knives!
        GNEISS!
Don: Jeepers! if you're THAT crazy about it,  So it's falling apart as well?
     HERE...it's YOURS!                       Away with it!

(and in the last page, the 'Rock Crusher' gag has gone, of course...)

I hadn't read the story for a while, and when I read the Dutch version, I
noticed that it's a very funny story, even without the word gags. That is
what you could call QUALITY... even when you remove all the textual gags
and references, still a good story remains!

--Harry.